If you follow me on FaceBook, then you know that I have been posting some serious material.
How long can the church of the United States be flaccid? We are a useless, rotten, maggot infested bunch of wussies.
Do we spend too much time trying to convince those in one denomination that they are wrong and should join another when we ought to be suffering for our faith? Why are we not persecuted for our love of God? Why is our most indignant moment as believers a small post in an online publication about a man losing his job at Home Depot for wearing a pin with a religious sentiment?
Why are those passionate for Christ so few here?
Satan has a stronghold on our government, our schools, our churches, our entertainment, our love of comfort.
And we eat it up, get real fat and cozy and sit on our butts proud of ourselves for having the key to heaven.
I am sick of myself for this...
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Kids Riding Bikes
When two of the older children (8 and 6) are out front riding bikes or, whatever, they are responsible to keep on eye on a younger brother (2). They just need to watch and let me know if there is a problem with where he is going or what he is doing. Their boundaries are clear and over the summer this has worked out quite well.
Today, the Biggers went out to play, and about 30 minutes later, one of them came in to tell me that they couldn't find the Little.
"Oh, honey" I calmly reply "he's napping."
"well, the boys and a neighbor are out looking for him and I was told to tell you to call 911"
"It's okay, we'll just let the neighbor know that Little is napping and everything is fine"
---boys walk in the door---
"Bigger," I say " Please let neighbor know that Little is home safe napping and that we don't need the police."
---off he goes---
---back he comes, mission accomplished---
---15 minutes later, County Sherrif is knocking on the door. The dog is in the house and barking furiously. I am asking the children, loudly, to put the dog in the back yard. Officer knocks even more loudly, on the window. I say, "just a moment!" He knocks again on the door - HARD! "just a moment were putting the dog out!"
I open the door. He askes if my kiddos are all safe and sound. yes, they're fine. He is getting messages over the radio about bad stuff happening. and takes my name address and phone number. It'll prob'ly be in the police blotter of the local paper.
What an exciting afternoon...
Today, the Biggers went out to play, and about 30 minutes later, one of them came in to tell me that they couldn't find the Little.
"Oh, honey" I calmly reply "he's napping."
"well, the boys and a neighbor are out looking for him and I was told to tell you to call 911"
"It's okay, we'll just let the neighbor know that Little is napping and everything is fine"
---boys walk in the door---
"Bigger," I say " Please let neighbor know that Little is home safe napping and that we don't need the police."
---off he goes---
---back he comes, mission accomplished---
---15 minutes later, County Sherrif is knocking on the door. The dog is in the house and barking furiously. I am asking the children, loudly, to put the dog in the back yard. Officer knocks even more loudly, on the window. I say, "just a moment!" He knocks again on the door - HARD! "just a moment were putting the dog out!"
I open the door. He askes if my kiddos are all safe and sound. yes, they're fine. He is getting messages over the radio about bad stuff happening. and takes my name address and phone number. It'll prob'ly be in the police blotter of the local paper.
What an exciting afternoon...
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Major Life Change
My oldest has gone to live with her father.
*sigh*
There are so many good reasons (for a 13 yo girl) for her to be there. There are so many good reasons for her father to have a hand at raising her.
There are so many more good reasons for her to have stayed here.
I am glad that I was able to raise her to the point where she makes her own decisions with a base of everything that she learned in my home. I pray daily, and more fervently than ever before, that she will continue to live according to the virtues and values that she learned with me.
I love and miss my baby girl. I don't have any great lessons learned from this experience except this: If this is how much it hurts when my children leave my home, even for good reasons, that I have much heartache in my future...
*sigh*
There are so many good reasons (for a 13 yo girl) for her to be there. There are so many good reasons for her father to have a hand at raising her.
There are so many more good reasons for her to have stayed here.
I am glad that I was able to raise her to the point where she makes her own decisions with a base of everything that she learned in my home. I pray daily, and more fervently than ever before, that she will continue to live according to the virtues and values that she learned with me.
I love and miss my baby girl. I don't have any great lessons learned from this experience except this: If this is how much it hurts when my children leave my home, even for good reasons, that I have much heartache in my future...
Monday, July 27, 2009
The HagenZoo Embarks on a Large, Accidental Adventure.
"Hey Kiddos!, jump in the van! It's time to get Marli!" Shouts of excitment ring through the air. Their older sister has been gone for over a week and they Hagen kids are ready to have her home. We choose the van because, while it doesn't have a radio, it DOES have air conditioning. Uneventful ride to Totem Lake, and Marli is now picked up.
We begin our catching up conversation and round the corner to get on the I405. "um, Mom? Did the van just quit?" asks Marli. "Why yes, I believe it has." replies Mom, cool and calm. We coast to a stop on the shoulder of the on-ramp and I activate the hazard lights. Good. Now, to call Jerry. "Hon, the van has stopped, it won't restart and we are on an on ramp to 405." Jerry replies "Oh. Wow! That's a problem. That's, um, okay. I'll get the suburban and come get you guys." I can tell he is trying not to sound worried and a little panicky. It's not working. I can still hear it, and I am glad he loves us enough to be worried!
We sit there for about 15 minutes. The van warms up. considerably. I roll down windows. The temperature inside the van is rising. This isn't good. Not good at all. think, think, think. What to do?
"Hey Kiddos! let's get out of the van! We're going for a walk!" What??!?!?" they ask? "ON THE FREEWAY?!?!?!? Is that even legal??!?!?!" (you can guess who said that! Yep, J.J.) "No, son, it isn't legal. But it is a superior action to the one that leaves you all cooking in the van, don't you think?" J.J.'s reply, "We could get cooked in the van? Really?" As J.J. is contemplating whether it would be more cool to find out if someone could actually get cooked in the van, or experience probable impending doom on the freeway, we are searching the van for the shoes that Andrew has removed. I realize, with chagrin, that the stroller is at home. Benjamin, whom you all have prayed for, had trouble putting on weight and not losing any. Not any more. He weighs about 19 lbs. That plus the 40 lb infant seat (it's an exaggeration, but not much...) are now hanging on my right arm, the purse and diaper bag on my left. We hop over the guard rail because it looks like there is a gravel pathway that might allow us to get down to the arterial road without having to walk on the shoulder. Not so much. Back up the gravel pathway, back over the guard rail.
I give explicit instructions to "Walk with your left hand ON the guard rail. NO EXCEPTIONS! Do not wiggle, do not jump or stretch. Do not run. Do not SNEEZE!" At this point my children are more afraid of death by Mom's voice than death by vehicular homicide.
We are walking, single file, down the on ramp. I count 20 vehicles go by us. Each on slowed, gave a wide arc around us and the faces they made were priceless! I wish I had a camera for each one! I had a couple of "What a terrible mother" looks, a few "Oh How awful! I wonder what happened" looks and at least one or two "What an inconvenience, get out of the road!" looks. Not one person stopped or bothered to ask if we needed help. One woman, six kids. Really? Not one? If you EVER see any thing like this. STOP AND ASK!!!!!
We make it to the intersection and are faced with a decision. Which way to go? We decide on Denny's. Air conditioned, notoriously slow service, and we have lots of time to kill. "No? You don't take checks? Oh....kay. We'll have three grand slam breakfasts." I carry cash for gas and grocery shopping. When I am not doing one of the two, I don't generally have much cash with me. It works. There's a lot of food on a Grand Slam break fast plate. It worked out beautifully. Our waitress was wonderful. She decorated four of the pancakes for the kids with strawberry syrup and checked on us often. We left her a good tip and left the restauraunt. Now what? I call Jerry. "Hi! How long?" "Well, I am going to see if I can borrow the Bentley's tow dolly!" "okay, hon! bye" Going to see. That means we have more time to use. What to do?
"Hey kiddos! We are going for another walk!" We walk across the street to the Totem Lake Mall, which closes at six pm on Sundays. It was 7:30 pm. We took over the covered entry and the sidewalk for 20 feet in either direction. We sat on the ground, layed on the ground, ran around and around and around on the ground, the children played, swung and hung on the bike rack. They sang and danced and played tag and I LET THEM.
"Mom, I'm thirsty." O Great. "I don't have any thing for you. Dad and Mr. Mark will be here soon." "Mom, I'm thirsty." So, four of the children repeat this refrain. One can't speak and the oldest knows better. The oldest is sent to the nearby Chevron for cold bottles of water. As she leaves, Jerry and Mr. Mark arrive. Halleluja!!!! We pile in, pick Marli up and head over to the on ramp to load the van on to the dolly. Backing down an on ramp, even on the shoulder, about as legal as walking around on the freeway - okay, we weren't hitch hiking.
"Hon?" Jerry replies "yes?" "Um, one of the kids had my keys over at the mall and I am sure they are laying on the pavement over there." "Oh. Really?" "um, yeah." "okay." Off we go. We pull over, Jerry wants to do a torque check, and I think He's really hungry. Mr. Mark takes me back to the mall to get my keys. There they lay, undisturbed on the sidewalk. We get back to the freeway. Mark says, Jerry's probably left there by now, you think?" I thought I was thinking when I replies "Yes, I'm sure he is." So...Mark brought me home. About 2 miles from home, my phone rang. "Mom?" "yes?" "Did you find your keys?" "yes!" "Good. Are you almost here?" "Um, almost home?" No, here" "Where are you?" At the parking lot." "Really?" "yes!" (Babies screaming in the background. Really, truly, screaming.) "Uh, tell Dad to head home. I am almost home." "uh, okay. Bye"
There you have it. A large, accidental adventure. I Wonder what tomorrow will bring...
We begin our catching up conversation and round the corner to get on the I405. "um, Mom? Did the van just quit?" asks Marli. "Why yes, I believe it has." replies Mom, cool and calm. We coast to a stop on the shoulder of the on-ramp and I activate the hazard lights. Good. Now, to call Jerry. "Hon, the van has stopped, it won't restart and we are on an on ramp to 405." Jerry replies "Oh. Wow! That's a problem. That's, um, okay. I'll get the suburban and come get you guys." I can tell he is trying not to sound worried and a little panicky. It's not working. I can still hear it, and I am glad he loves us enough to be worried!
We sit there for about 15 minutes. The van warms up. considerably. I roll down windows. The temperature inside the van is rising. This isn't good. Not good at all. think, think, think. What to do?
"Hey Kiddos! let's get out of the van! We're going for a walk!" What??!?!?" they ask? "ON THE FREEWAY?!?!?!? Is that even legal??!?!?!" (you can guess who said that! Yep, J.J.) "No, son, it isn't legal. But it is a superior action to the one that leaves you all cooking in the van, don't you think?" J.J.'s reply, "We could get cooked in the van? Really?" As J.J. is contemplating whether it would be more cool to find out if someone could actually get cooked in the van, or experience probable impending doom on the freeway, we are searching the van for the shoes that Andrew has removed. I realize, with chagrin, that the stroller is at home. Benjamin, whom you all have prayed for, had trouble putting on weight and not losing any. Not any more. He weighs about 19 lbs. That plus the 40 lb infant seat (it's an exaggeration, but not much...) are now hanging on my right arm, the purse and diaper bag on my left. We hop over the guard rail because it looks like there is a gravel pathway that might allow us to get down to the arterial road without having to walk on the shoulder. Not so much. Back up the gravel pathway, back over the guard rail.
I give explicit instructions to "Walk with your left hand ON the guard rail. NO EXCEPTIONS! Do not wiggle, do not jump or stretch. Do not run. Do not SNEEZE!" At this point my children are more afraid of death by Mom's voice than death by vehicular homicide.
We are walking, single file, down the on ramp. I count 20 vehicles go by us. Each on slowed, gave a wide arc around us and the faces they made were priceless! I wish I had a camera for each one! I had a couple of "What a terrible mother" looks, a few "Oh How awful! I wonder what happened" looks and at least one or two "What an inconvenience, get out of the road!" looks. Not one person stopped or bothered to ask if we needed help. One woman, six kids. Really? Not one? If you EVER see any thing like this. STOP AND ASK!!!!!
We make it to the intersection and are faced with a decision. Which way to go? We decide on Denny's. Air conditioned, notoriously slow service, and we have lots of time to kill. "No? You don't take checks? Oh....kay. We'll have three grand slam breakfasts." I carry cash for gas and grocery shopping. When I am not doing one of the two, I don't generally have much cash with me. It works. There's a lot of food on a Grand Slam break fast plate. It worked out beautifully. Our waitress was wonderful. She decorated four of the pancakes for the kids with strawberry syrup and checked on us often. We left her a good tip and left the restauraunt. Now what? I call Jerry. "Hi! How long?" "Well, I am going to see if I can borrow the Bentley's tow dolly!" "okay, hon! bye" Going to see. That means we have more time to use. What to do?
"Hey kiddos! We are going for another walk!" We walk across the street to the Totem Lake Mall, which closes at six pm on Sundays. It was 7:30 pm. We took over the covered entry and the sidewalk for 20 feet in either direction. We sat on the ground, layed on the ground, ran around and around and around on the ground, the children played, swung and hung on the bike rack. They sang and danced and played tag and I LET THEM.
"Mom, I'm thirsty." O Great. "I don't have any thing for you. Dad and Mr. Mark will be here soon." "Mom, I'm thirsty." So, four of the children repeat this refrain. One can't speak and the oldest knows better. The oldest is sent to the nearby Chevron for cold bottles of water. As she leaves, Jerry and Mr. Mark arrive. Halleluja!!!! We pile in, pick Marli up and head over to the on ramp to load the van on to the dolly. Backing down an on ramp, even on the shoulder, about as legal as walking around on the freeway - okay, we weren't hitch hiking.
"Hon?" Jerry replies "yes?" "Um, one of the kids had my keys over at the mall and I am sure they are laying on the pavement over there." "Oh. Really?" "um, yeah." "okay." Off we go. We pull over, Jerry wants to do a torque check, and I think He's really hungry. Mr. Mark takes me back to the mall to get my keys. There they lay, undisturbed on the sidewalk. We get back to the freeway. Mark says, Jerry's probably left there by now, you think?" I thought I was thinking when I replies "Yes, I'm sure he is." So...Mark brought me home. About 2 miles from home, my phone rang. "Mom?" "yes?" "Did you find your keys?" "yes!" "Good. Are you almost here?" "Um, almost home?" No, here" "Where are you?" At the parking lot." "Really?" "yes!" (Babies screaming in the background. Really, truly, screaming.) "Uh, tell Dad to head home. I am almost home." "uh, okay. Bye"
There you have it. A large, accidental adventure. I Wonder what tomorrow will bring...
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Thoughts on Food
A good friend and I were having a conversation in which the subject arose of 'feeding the whole neighborhood'. Children from other families are playing at or near our house, and it is snack time. My children come in with 3-7 (usually) others asking for a snack. 'Wow.' I'm thinkging. 'How'm I gonna feed all of these kids?'. Do I tell the others that they need to go home and get a snack? Here's what I am finding out: Some of the children either don't get a snack at home, or get some kind of sugary snack. They get cold, fresh fruit, cheese, nuts, crackers and popcicles at my house. This can get expensive just for my family!
Have you ever had your mind blasted with a Holy Spirit Meteor? It happens to me once in while. this Holy Spirit Mind Blast reminded me who provides the food. God does. Does He provide food to my family because He is obligated? I think not. He provides food to my family so that we will responsibly fuel our human bodies to continue building His Kingdom here on earth. He provides food to my family because He enjoys sharing good things with us. He provides food to my family so that we will share his blessing.
I won't be stingy with snacks anymore, and I'll be working on responsible fueling...
Have you ever had your mind blasted with a Holy Spirit Meteor? It happens to me once in while. this Holy Spirit Mind Blast reminded me who provides the food. God does. Does He provide food to my family because He is obligated? I think not. He provides food to my family so that we will responsibly fuel our human bodies to continue building His Kingdom here on earth. He provides food to my family because He enjoys sharing good things with us. He provides food to my family so that we will share his blessing.
I won't be stingy with snacks anymore, and I'll be working on responsible fueling...
Sunday, June 28, 2009
The Power of Prayer
Books about prayer have been leaping off of bookshelves and into my hands for a while. Some are hokey, some are amazing, some are dull, some are exciting!
I know something about prayer. I grew up hearing about it, reading about it in the bible. Praying at meal times, bed times, troubeling times, praying for safety and for needs.
Suddenly, it seems, my heart is yearning for prayer. If I didn't pray early in the morning, I find myself sneaking off away from my LOUD family to spend a few moments in prayer. I keep a prayer journal and refer to it often. I want to speak to God and I want God to speak to me.
If you read my posts regularly, you'll notice that I often wonder why my life is the way it is. Most especially, when so many children? One of the reasons is becoming clear (one of many reasons).
Prayer. If it is difficult at best for me to get all six children out of the house to someplace where I have to have an eyeball and hand available for each one, by myself, chances are, we won't go. I end up saying
'no' to many activities because of my husband's schedule. I can not, in good consience, take my children on my own to whatever it is and expect everything to go well. So...we spend a little more time at home. I find a little more time to pray. My prayer time is becoming more purposeful. There is power it prayer. It's amazing to note things that happen when I know that people have been praying about a specific thing.
I know that God would have to 'ground' me in a significant way in order to make me consider prayer a significant and useful part of my life, then do it.
*UPDATE TO POST*
I wrote this post eight years ago, just at the beginning of my blogging journey. I wish I could say I'm better at editing now, but I'm not.
I can say I'm better at prayer.
Maybe not 'at prayer', but at praying. The actual doing of it. If I say I'm going to pray for you, I mean it. I don't forget to as often these days. If you post about needing prayer on social media, I pray in the moment when I see it. If I have time to be scrolling through, I have time to stop and pray.
Praying at all times isn't mysterious anymore. It is possible, and preferable. That part I keep trying to get better at. Praying without ceasing. I wish I could say that my thoughts are always on the Kingdom of Heaven. They aren't. My thoughts roam. Sometimes they get caught on something. Now and then they build things. Big things that are impossible to see around. I have quite a talent for assuming what's going to happen, and then taking it around with me as truth.
Often, though, I get to recognize it. I get to take down whatever thing my roaming thoughts constructed, and see it for what it is, or at least to take off my own perception of it and stare at it for a minute.
This often results in just walking away from a thought. My own thought. The thought that I grabbed and built into some ruinous monster. I can do that through prayer. It's really the only way I can do it.
I've tried before. Just squeeze my eyes really tight, think of something else and then when I open my eyes, the thought that was bothering me will magically disappear.
Sometimes that can work, at least temporarily. Then it really is just a magicians trick. Not really magic.
The real magic is when I give a thing to God, leave it in His hands, and trust that he will take care of it. That doesn't mean I have no responsibility left. I still have to leave it in his hands. I still have to chat with Him, learn about His character, build mine.
Talking to God is a significant and useful thing in my life. I do it. It helps.
I'd still like to get to the 'pray without ceasing' part. I don't know that I'll recognize when it happens, but I've observed people who, at the very least, appear to live this way. It's encouraging, the wisdom, strength and kindness of such people.
I don't know if anyone will ever describe my life that way, but I do aspire to reflect God's character. The best way I know how to learn it is by talking with Him.
I know something about prayer. I grew up hearing about it, reading about it in the bible. Praying at meal times, bed times, troubeling times, praying for safety and for needs.
Suddenly, it seems, my heart is yearning for prayer. If I didn't pray early in the morning, I find myself sneaking off away from my LOUD family to spend a few moments in prayer. I keep a prayer journal and refer to it often. I want to speak to God and I want God to speak to me.
If you read my posts regularly, you'll notice that I often wonder why my life is the way it is. Most especially, when so many children? One of the reasons is becoming clear (one of many reasons).
Prayer. If it is difficult at best for me to get all six children out of the house to someplace where I have to have an eyeball and hand available for each one, by myself, chances are, we won't go. I end up saying
'no' to many activities because of my husband's schedule. I can not, in good consience, take my children on my own to whatever it is and expect everything to go well. So...we spend a little more time at home. I find a little more time to pray. My prayer time is becoming more purposeful. There is power it prayer. It's amazing to note things that happen when I know that people have been praying about a specific thing.
I know that God would have to 'ground' me in a significant way in order to make me consider prayer a significant and useful part of my life, then do it.
*UPDATE TO POST*
I wrote this post eight years ago, just at the beginning of my blogging journey. I wish I could say I'm better at editing now, but I'm not.
I can say I'm better at prayer.
Maybe not 'at prayer', but at praying. The actual doing of it. If I say I'm going to pray for you, I mean it. I don't forget to as often these days. If you post about needing prayer on social media, I pray in the moment when I see it. If I have time to be scrolling through, I have time to stop and pray.
Praying at all times isn't mysterious anymore. It is possible, and preferable. That part I keep trying to get better at. Praying without ceasing. I wish I could say that my thoughts are always on the Kingdom of Heaven. They aren't. My thoughts roam. Sometimes they get caught on something. Now and then they build things. Big things that are impossible to see around. I have quite a talent for assuming what's going to happen, and then taking it around with me as truth.
Often, though, I get to recognize it. I get to take down whatever thing my roaming thoughts constructed, and see it for what it is, or at least to take off my own perception of it and stare at it for a minute.
This often results in just walking away from a thought. My own thought. The thought that I grabbed and built into some ruinous monster. I can do that through prayer. It's really the only way I can do it.
I've tried before. Just squeeze my eyes really tight, think of something else and then when I open my eyes, the thought that was bothering me will magically disappear.
Sometimes that can work, at least temporarily. Then it really is just a magicians trick. Not really magic.
The real magic is when I give a thing to God, leave it in His hands, and trust that he will take care of it. That doesn't mean I have no responsibility left. I still have to leave it in his hands. I still have to chat with Him, learn about His character, build mine.
Talking to God is a significant and useful thing in my life. I do it. It helps.
I'd still like to get to the 'pray without ceasing' part. I don't know that I'll recognize when it happens, but I've observed people who, at the very least, appear to live this way. It's encouraging, the wisdom, strength and kindness of such people.
I don't know if anyone will ever describe my life that way, but I do aspire to reflect God's character. The best way I know how to learn it is by talking with Him.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Quiver Full?
"We are allowing God to determine the size of our family." Said by several women that have 6, 7, 8 + children. The standard answer for those brazen enough to ask things like "how many will you have?" and "are you having more?"
Here's the question: Did couples with fewer children, then, not allow God to determine the size of their families?
There are many Godly families that have 1, 2, 3, or 4 children. They are living a life according to the path that God has laid out before them. They are seeking God's will for their lives. God has spoken to these families, in some way, to allow them knowledge, wisdom and/or peace about the size of their family.
So I will be careful, as a mother of 6, about using that phrase, "...allowing God to determine the size of our family." I want to communicate that we are seeking to want what God wants for us, whether that means a large family or a small one, whether it means homeschooling or not, whether it means raising many disciples at home to go out and serve, or intensly serving our communities without children in tow.
Is there a fabulous phrase to communicate that God determines what a 'full quiver' means for each family? What about something like this "God is providing a ministry of discipling many children in our home."
Or am I getting a little to PC?
Here's the question: Did couples with fewer children, then, not allow God to determine the size of their families?
There are many Godly families that have 1, 2, 3, or 4 children. They are living a life according to the path that God has laid out before them. They are seeking God's will for their lives. God has spoken to these families, in some way, to allow them knowledge, wisdom and/or peace about the size of their family.
So I will be careful, as a mother of 6, about using that phrase, "...allowing God to determine the size of our family." I want to communicate that we are seeking to want what God wants for us, whether that means a large family or a small one, whether it means homeschooling or not, whether it means raising many disciples at home to go out and serve, or intensly serving our communities without children in tow.
Is there a fabulous phrase to communicate that God determines what a 'full quiver' means for each family? What about something like this "God is providing a ministry of discipling many children in our home."
Or am I getting a little to PC?
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