Thursday, May 21, 2009

Leadership at home - mostly.

Are men natural leaders? Do they automatically step up to head of the family just because they are men? Do they desire to have leadership even if their wives have assumed that role?
Women have been told that they are disrespecting their husband when they choose to keep the family under their own direction. If these women were to relinquish this role, would the men step up to that role? Does confidence come with they Y chromosome?
I boldly declare the answer to be 'No.'
While there are instances of overbearing women disrespecting their husbands, refusing to give up their powerful position as leader of the home, I believe that there are many men that do not want that position. That they would just as soon have someone else make the decisions, handle the finances, raise the children, do the negotiating.
Is it wrong for a man to give his wife these responsibilities? Giving the responsibilities is the key. What if he just sits back and does nothing, forcing his wife to assume these responsibilities. What if she takes on the responsibilities, and, over time begins to loose respect for her husband.
Okay, here's the thought that has been roaming around in my head, waiting for the questions to catch up. Wives, we have the responsiblity not only to relinquish head of home to our husbands, but to encourage and support them in that responsibility. Help them build their confidence, and offer to be a helpmeet.
This is a challenge for me. I am not a natural leader, as are so many women that I know. I don't lead my family gracefully, it is a challenge and I often grunt through my days in misery and with much rebellion in my heart.
My husband desires, because it is biblical to do so, to be the leader in our home. He knows that there are many things that I can do more effectively than he can (i.e., home school, grocery shopping, menu making, communication, set up house and home, keep skeds, etc.), and he trusts me with these areas. I, in turn, strive (because it is biblical to do so - and because I desire to allow our home to be God centered) to support my husbands efforts to be a leader in our home, exhorting him and respecting his growth as a man of God.
Not that I don't still make the occassional suggestion...

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